I had the biggest over the top visions and dreamy plans in my head of what we were going to do when we all arrived home and how their whole arrival would be. I mean, they were completely unrealistic but I like to live in my own little dream world sometimes.
As soon as we got home, David and Grace raced up the stairs so fast they never saw the welcome home sign or any other part of the house to be frank. They saw stairs and literally sprouted wings in search of their very own bedroom. Over the years, David and Grace never had a bed or even their own bedroom. This was huge for them! We didn’t share any details about their room before we arrived. We kept this little detail a secret from them; we wanted them to have some element of surprise when we arrived home.
Grace entered her overpowering pink bedroom and she quickly started looking at her new clothes, hair bows and going through the drawers to see what was in her room. Our son, David, found the Legos we had and sat down and made every Lego set we had in his room. He has an amazing talent to build Legos so intensely and so fast.
We spent the day doing lots of family activities together to help us in the bonding process as a family. We cooked dinner together and I learned that spaghetti is a common dinner item we can all eat but veggies are a different story.
After dinner, Grace gave me my first makeover as she called it. I was covered in pink and purple necklaces and about 4 plastic rings that couldn’t fit over my knuckles. After I was covered in princess jewelry, the nail polish came out. Grace decided to paint my nails every color of the rainbow. She even decided to add a bit of sparkle and glitter to them for a little more pizzazz. I wore the nail polish as long as I could. However, given that I had an important meeting at the office on Monday, the polish had to go Sunday night. I am sure it would have been a great conversation starter but it doesn’t exactly scream professional.
I had some wonderful conversations with my daughter who opened up so honestly. Grace had the courage to share two things that had been bothering her. She was able to gather her courage and share with me that she was worried that we didn’t look alike. Grace was struggling with why she doesn’t look like me. As her Mom, I have blonde hair and blue eyes. Our daughter has long brown hair and deep brown eyes. I shared with her that our outside appearances may not be alike but our hearts are the same and we share many other similarities. I reminded her how families do not always look alike. Families can be unique and beautiful and families are more than just the blood or DNA they may share because it’s much deeper than anything superficial and families are always therefore each other. I promised her I would never leave her and I would always be here through the good and the bad no matter if my hair was purple and my eyes were orange.
Just when I thought I got off one tough conversation, she then asked me, “Did you adopt your other children?” I shared with her we didn’t adopt them. She said, “Then why do you want to adopt me and my brother”? Such a great question she had for me and one that came straight from her heart. I explained to her that Mommy and Daddy prayed for years to have another child and when the time was right, God safely placed her and her brother into our lives. Now that we finally found each other, we will never be separated. I shared with her she was chosen, we chose her and her brother. They are wanted and they are worthy.
Christy Benson is the director of Clinical Informatics Analysis & Measurement for
Texas Health Resources, Mom to two boys, and Foster Mom.