Could this be it?

As I was pulling out of our driveway heading to church last Wednesday night (5:50pm to be exact!), my two sons and our foster daughter and I waved goodbye out of our SUV’s window to our Adoption/Foster placement agency worker who stopped by for her monthly visit to see Amanda.

As we all smiled and waved good bye, she flew two hands up against her car window gesturing to me to stop, wait!  I rolled down my window and she said: “Do you remember, the little girl from west Texas you submitted your home study for?”  I wish I could say yes instantly but after submitting our home study for half a dozen children my brain does become a bit fuzzy on the specifics.

However, to keep me organized, I developed a spreadsheet that listed crucial information about each child we hoped to adopt.  For those who know me, this isn’t much of a surprise to know I have a spreadsheet for this!  As I quickly pulled my SUV to the side of the street, I ran back into the house and pulled up our adoption spreadsheet.  It was at that time, we determined it was Caroline!

Caroline was our fourth submission we made in a long list of home studies we have submitted ourselves for.  She was an adorable little two-year-old girl who loves preschool and loves her teddy bear.  We were told that her placement into an adoption-ready home was going to go fast. However, how do you define fast? My definition of fast could me end of week. However, CPS may define fast as 6 months.

I was told to get a family Lifebook or a scrap book together quickly that would include photos of our family and home. This book will be given to CPS and they will review it along with the three other families who want to adopt Caroline which will assist in their decision making process.  That’s right; we have a 25% chance of being selected to adopt Caroline. However, out of the hundreds of home studies that were sent to CPS to adopt Caroline, we are so happy we are in the top four. We have never been this close before; our other home study submissions for other children have resulted in silence from CPS.  We just keep moving forward knowing that our daughter is somewhere and there is a purpose and reason why we haven’t been chosen in the past.

As of lunch Monday, we had handed our family Lifebook to our placement agency who will present our family to CPS today to make the decision. Our life could change tonight. We expect CPS to make a choice today, to allow us to adopt Caroline or provide the same opportunity to another family to make their dreams come true too.

While we would love and pray that Caroline becomes a part of our forever family, what gives me peace is that knowing there are three other families who want Caroline too who will provide her a loving and safe home.  That’s what every child needs and deserves regardless of which family is chosen.

Christy Benson is the director of Clinical Informatics Analysis & Measurement for Texas Health Resources, Mom to two boys, and Foster Mom who is anxiously awaiting word on whether she'll be chosen.